Ok, I have been saying this for around 2 hours now. But I need to settle my thoughts a little first. So here I am....with a lot in my heart and too many words in my head. But I am happy, life is good. No matter what, even when I'm up or when I'm down, Life is good. It really is. I am so blessed, so very blessed by my Heavenly father and I don't tell Him that often enough. And yet, He just keeps on filling me with more blessings. And the beauty of it all, for me, is that He loves me no matter what. no matter what. just like that. He loves me. He knows my name. He is my Father. Wow. My heart is singing right now...a heart full of love. All I can say is Wow. And let the tears of joy and pain and sorrow flow as one, because He knows my name.
--mcb
Saturday, December 4, 2010
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Me, Myself, and I....and my Buddy, too
It's been a down day; not sad, not depressed, just down. Took a too long nap, which didn't help. But my buddy, Barbara, has called several times. I answer and she always asks, "Whatcha doin?" Her mental age has not quite caught up to her chronological age and I am fortunate to be one of her visiting teachers. She has a beautiful personality. Being one of her buds is a true blessing in my life. I am now listening to the music from Tiffany's blog and getting pretty relaxed. What a beautiful play list. My 10 days of beauty took a nose dive today....I didn't, but the project just didn't make a go today. Maybe yet tonight. Or maybe not. It's cold here, at least for central florida.
I have no specific goals, just long term ones. I am 59, on social security disability because of my bi-polar disorder. Not very active in church, but.want to there every week. I take around 20 meds, and all of my psych meds at bedtime. Long story short, I have an extrememly hard time waking up. But, as my "bud" tells me, Jesus will be disappointed in me. She was baptized last March and has not missed a day of Sabbath meetings.
Back to my goals, or lack of them. Will be a good "project" for me....breaking down my one long-term into easier to attain small goals. I am one who gets easily distracted. So will keep a notebook by my favorite place to sit, which also happens to be my dog, Mitzi's fav place and then my cat, Noelle loves to sit on the other side of me. Then....I'm digressing here. So will stop for now.
Hugs, mcb
p.s. As you can tell by reading my posting, my mind, at the moment, is having a hard time settling down. But it is not quite all over the place...but getting there. Tiffany, your play list is soothiing to me...and the support of our MB sisters is priceless. Really. Priceless.
I have no specific goals, just long term ones. I am 59, on social security disability because of my bi-polar disorder. Not very active in church, but.want to there every week. I take around 20 meds, and all of my psych meds at bedtime. Long story short, I have an extrememly hard time waking up. But, as my "bud" tells me, Jesus will be disappointed in me. She was baptized last March and has not missed a day of Sabbath meetings.
Back to my goals, or lack of them. Will be a good "project" for me....breaking down my one long-term into easier to attain small goals. I am one who gets easily distracted. So will keep a notebook by my favorite place to sit, which also happens to be my dog, Mitzi's fav place and then my cat, Noelle loves to sit on the other side of me. Then....I'm digressing here. So will stop for now.
Hugs, mcb
p.s. As you can tell by reading my posting, my mind, at the moment, is having a hard time settling down. But it is not quite all over the place...but getting there. Tiffany, your play list is soothiing to me...and the support of our MB sisters is priceless. Really. Priceless.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Day One--Blessings of my Body
Day one of a special 10 day project. Today we need to write for at least 10 minutes about the blessings of our bodies. At the moment, my body does not want to work very often without pain. Other than that, It's a pretty good body. Heavy, not beautiful, workable. Hair is impossible. But, and that's a big but, My body has given me many blessings.
I can still walk, which I love to do. My brain, at times, gets a little befuddled, but that is mainly due to my many meds. However, my brain works well, helps me to learn quickly, which helps me to maintain a high level of intelligence. My small hands and small wrists, help me to feel dainty, even at my size. My heart is strong, beating for me day in and day out. My lungs work well to bring oxygen in and expel the carbon dioxide. My hands, though they sometimes tremble, help me to work on the many crafts that I love. To start with a skein of yarn, making a usable item, or to start with blank cardstock, making beautiful greeting cards, etc. help me to feel useful and creative. Thank you hands for cooperating. My teeth are another matter. Missing all my lower teeth and quite a few of my upper teeth. However, I manage quite well and it's surprising what I can eat with so few teeth. So, in fact, they are a blessing to me. My body functions pretty well, with some hiccups here and there.
I came to earth to acquire a body and so that is a huge blessing. No matter how I look, how my body works, I am a child of God and he loves me unconditionally. Now, I have to learn to love myself unconditionally. That's the hard part.
---mcb
I can still walk, which I love to do. My brain, at times, gets a little befuddled, but that is mainly due to my many meds. However, my brain works well, helps me to learn quickly, which helps me to maintain a high level of intelligence. My small hands and small wrists, help me to feel dainty, even at my size. My heart is strong, beating for me day in and day out. My lungs work well to bring oxygen in and expel the carbon dioxide. My hands, though they sometimes tremble, help me to work on the many crafts that I love. To start with a skein of yarn, making a usable item, or to start with blank cardstock, making beautiful greeting cards, etc. help me to feel useful and creative. Thank you hands for cooperating. My teeth are another matter. Missing all my lower teeth and quite a few of my upper teeth. However, I manage quite well and it's surprising what I can eat with so few teeth. So, in fact, they are a blessing to me. My body functions pretty well, with some hiccups here and there.
I came to earth to acquire a body and so that is a huge blessing. No matter how I look, how my body works, I am a child of God and he loves me unconditionally. Now, I have to learn to love myself unconditionally. That's the hard part.
---mcb
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